Aussie, Courtney Osbourne, Is Fed Up With Constantly Being Confused With Ozzie Osbourne! Read Our Exclusive Interview!

VCR: Hello Mr. Osbourne. So can you tell us why, other than sharing a surname, people are constantly confusing you with former Black Sabbath frontman and current reality sitcom star Ozzie Osbourne.

Courtney Osbourne: Well matey it's like this. A few of me mates and I were recently visiting my sister in London. Well one night we hopped down to a club in Piccadilly for a bit of a nip. One thing led to another and someone came up to me and asked me where I was from. I told them that I was was from Sydney. Then they asked me my name and I told them Courtney Osbourne. Well this individual then started refering to me as that Aussie, Osbourne.

VCR: I see. So someone overheard this and took it as Ozzie Osbourne?

Courtney Osbourne: I assume so. From that point it just got out of control.

VCR: I wonder why. You don't have any resemblance to Ozzie.

Courtney Osbourne: No I surely don't. Why just the other day Tony told me that he didn't understand it either. And he should know.

VCR: Tony?

Courtney Osbourne: Yeah. Tony Iommi. A good mate of mine. Plays guitar with Black Sabbath. He tells me that I don't look anything like Ozzie.

VCR: So why do you think the confusion continues?

Courtney Osbourne: Bloody hell matey if I knew that I'd buy some lottery tickets and retire to the Outback. It's a mystery to me. I'll tell you what though, it is really starting to get under me skin. It's always Ozzie this, Ozzie that. I swear if one more of those freaks comes up to me and asks me to bite the head off of something I'll shove a boomerang right up his arse I will.

VCR: So what is it that you hope to accomplish with this interview?

Courtney Osbourne: Well I sort of figure that if I can get my story out there, then people will begin to realize that Courtney Osbourne and Ozzie Osbourne are two entirely different people. Tony told me that if I do that he would give me the gig.

VCR: The gig?

Courtney Osbourne: Yeah matey. The gig. That's what we call it in the record business when you have a job. Tony has asked me to be his new singer, but only if I can clear up the confusion.

VCR: Well it seems to me that if people thought that Ozzie Osbourne was back with Black Sabbath they would be more interested.

Courtney Osbourne: What's that supposed to mean?

VCR: I just meant that...

Courtney Osbourne: I can arrange for that boomerang to find your arse Mr. Reporter. You might just want to watch your mouth. Tell me matey have you ever been raped by a kangaroo?

VCR: Uh...no.

Courtney Osbourne: Well I have matey, and let me tell you it's not a pretty thing. They've got claws you know. Not many people know that but it's true. They'll scratch you up pretty bad when they get into heat.

VCR: Uh...I'll keep that in mind.

Courtney Osbourne: You do that Mister. You just do that. Damned kangaroos.

Anonymous Australian Citizen Tired of Constantly Being Mistaken For Ozzie Osbourne!